31 Days Of Horror (Day 14) – The Thing (1982)
Things go bump in the night, others will devour your soul, some will slice, dice eat your heart with a nice glass of Chianti. October has now arrived which can mean only one thing 31 Days of Horror has now arrived again. For the next 31 days, we will dive deep into the catacombs of horror to pick you a movie. Every day will be different ranging from the classics to the weird and wonderful. Many you might have heard of, some will be new to you. There will be personal favourites that you may like, others you may hate but they all will unleash those emotions that make us love horror.
Day 14 Sandra Harris delivers a look at one of the best Remakes that maybe better than the original, John Carpenter’s The Thing
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Itโs shocking nowadays to read over the bad reviews this film initially garnered on its release, and then to compare them with the rave reviews itโs received retrospectively and continues to receive to this day.
Either those early critics really, really got it wrong or it was simply a case, as some people think, of THE THINGโs having simply found it too hard to compete with two other films that were released at the same time.
Namely, Steven Spielbergโs E.T. THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL, which of course presents an altogether different, more positive view of alien visitors from Outer Space, and Ridley Scottโs BLADE RUNNER. 1982 was clearly a good year for science fiction moviesโฆ!
Suffice it to say here that this film is widely regarded nowadays as one of the best horror movies ever made and John Carpenter, its creator, one of the best horror movie directors. Did I mention that I saw him perform his movie soundtracks live in Dublinโs Vicar Street last Halloween Week? Didn’t I? Well, gather round, friends, and I shall tell you a wondrous taleโฆ!
Haha, Iโm only joking. I told that story enough last year. Today weโll just talk about THE THING. So, um, well, hereโs the thing, geddit? See what I did there?
Itโs the story of a highly malevolent, parasitic alien life form that somehow finds its way onto an American scientific research station in Antarctica, after thousands of years of being buried nice and cosy-like in the ice.
Thatโs a hell of a story, isnโt it? Something similar happens in the marvellous horror movie, HORROR EXPRESS, starring Hammer royalty Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing, and also TV detective Kojak, aka actor Telly Savalas. Who loves ya, baby?
Anyway, once the lads at the research station encounter THE THING for the first time (in their dog pound as itโs initially taken the form of a cute cuddly bow-bow), they still donโt even grasp the enormity of the situation theyโre in. This is only the beginning of the horror for the men, whose lives on the station are probably isolated enough and tough enough as it is.
THE THING has the power to take on any life-form it chooses, but only if thereโs already an existing life-form for it to take the shape and form of, if you get me. It sneakily decides to take on the appearance of various scientists at the station, and the only way for the other brainiacs to tell the difference is by doing a blood test, which isnโt always convenient:
โUm, excuse me, Mr. Thing, would you mind awfully just taking a seat here and giving me your arm? Itโs only a little prick, youโll hardly feel it, and you can TOTALLY go back to killing us all afterwards, I promise! We even have lollipops here for anyone who gives blood. Hey, how about those Mets, huhโฆ?โ
Kurt Russell, deeply attractive in a full beard and with his thermal long johns on under his outer clothing, is the main character, R.J. MacReady, and the scientist whoโs the most proactive in trying to track down and destroy THE THING. Heโs (Mac) ready for anything, geddit? His answer to everything is fire. Itโs hilarious.
Every time he spots anything that remotely resembles THE THING, he turns a flame-thrower on it and no exceptions. If heโs not careful, heโll forget himself and end up scratching his arse with that flame-thrower or trying to turn on the TV with it. It reminds me of an episode of THE SIMPSONS where theyโre trying to figure out something, I forget what, and Marge ends up saying โNo fires!โ to all of Homerโs pyromaniacal suggestions.
The feeling of suspicion and paranoia that builds up in the station as the men all view each other now as potential enemies is so strong, itโs almost palpable. Everyoneโs all, like, letโs just sit here, real nice and quiet-like, where we can all keep an eye on each other, real friendly-like.
No-one trusts anyone else and, when mensโ tempers are frayed in such an isolated and claustrophobic situation, things can be triggered almost accidentally, bad things.
Again, itโs like that episode of THE SIMPSONS in which Bart Simpson, Milhouse Van Houten and Martin Prince each have shares in a rare comic-book, the first RADIOACTIVE MAN comic or something, but they quickly grow to distrust each other, each thinking that the other is planning to commandeer the comic for itself. There are very few situations in life that canโt in some way be compared to an episode of THE SIMPSONSโฆ!
The special effects of THE THING are amazingly good, stomach-turning and extremely gory. Theyโre so good itโs actually incredible to think that they were created a whopping thirty-five years ago and yet theyโve never been bettered since.
Please donโt argue with me about this. I am a woman. I am programmed to win every argument, without exception, and I fight dirty, too, and Iโll resort to tears if I have to, haha.
Although there are some excellent horror film franchises on the go today (INSIDIOUS, THE CONJURING, SINISTER, PARANORMAL ACTIVITY, to name but a few), no-oneโs ever really managed to scale the dizzying heights that John Carpenter and Rob Bottin achieved together all those years ago. Maybe no-one ever will.
I read online that the film is screened every Winter, along with THE SHINING, for the lads at the Amundsen-Scott South Pole Station. Thatโs funny and kinda sweet but itโs also a bit like showing ALIVE as the in-flight movie on an aeroplane or a virus outbreak film in the hospital waiting-room to people experiencing, well, um, a viral outbreak. Funny but inadvisable, haha. Maybe even a little tactlessโฆ!
Iโm off now to make a nice cup of tea to settle my stomach after all those gory special effects. I only wish there were some way to do it where I didnโt have to get up from my chair, wash a cup, get the teabags, boil the kettleโฆ Wait a minute. Whereโs me flamethrowerโฆ?
SANDRA HARRIS. ยฉ
Horror, Sci-fi | USA, 1982 | 15 | Arrow Video | Dir.John Carpenter | Kurt Russell, Wilford Brimley, Keith David
Thanks To Sandra whose review was originally posted on her own blogย ย sandrafirstruleoffilmclubharris
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